Many parents tell me that their children either do not enjoy food or are drawn to the less healthy choices. It can be very challenging to have this tension around what should be one of the most enjoyable activities for our species! Parents turn to nutritional therapy to help address their children’s eczema, asthma, behavioural issues or many other conditions, but what should they are met with a refusal to eat well?
In the article below I share what worked for me both as a mother of three, and as a nutritional therapist – when encouraging the love for healthy eating is an essential foundation of family health and any treatment plan.
1. Take a closer look
Our food preferences are connected to the memories certain foods hold in our hearts and bellies. Some of these preferences are created even before we were born and are formed from our mothers’ dietary choices and even from the composition of their own microbiome – the ecosystem of bacteria we inherit from our mums. These micro-organisms can influence what we think we like to eat – for instance, the yeast candida is able to very cleverly make people crave more sugary foods as this is the food this yeast needs in order to thrive.
It is essential to really pay attention to these individual preferences as they hold a lot of information about the child’s digestive system. Are there any digestive discomforts such as tummy aches or bloating? Children sometimes do not want to eat when they have learnt to expect discomfort following a meal.
2. Eat together
There is a clear correlation between what children see eaten at home and what they themselves are willing to eat, especially when it comes to fruit and vegetables. This also begins before birth – unborn children taste everything their mothers eat which for breastfed babies this continues even longer via their mother’s ever changing milk. By the time children are 6 months old, they really already know so many flavours and are intently watching us at mealtimes! So, be the role model for your child even before she is born! Show your child you are truly enthusiastic about the healthy food on your plates. Eat together – for young babies, this may mean exploring the Baby Led Weaning (BLW) method and allowing your child to play and experience food – this is very powerful in teaching that family meals and food are not just about the function of eating, but that they are also about ritual, connectedness, and family love – which in itself raises oxytocin, the hormone of calm and love. Make all mealtimes relaxed, and fun.
3. Empower your child to accept food
If your child rejects food, it may be because the food is not that tasty, or it may be because this is the only aspect of her life that she can control. When children are small and when most life choices are made by their parents, this ability to reject food can be very appealing to hold onto. It can be very positive and helpful if parents find a way to empower their children to accept food. Offer options. For instance, if there are two choices, how about the child decides which one to eat? Parents create the eating space – they are the ones who define the what and where and when of eating, and the children decide if and how much.
4. Create familiarity
Some studies show that we eat certain foods because we have known them for a long time. Their taste is familiar to us. Children increase their willingness to eat specific vegetables they said they didn’t like before, when they were asked to taste them every day for 2 weeks. Suggest a guideline that your child will need to try something at least once before rejecting it completely, and remember that children’s taste preferences undergo constant change and it is possible that if, for instance, your child rejected steamed kale last month, she may like it next time, particularly if it’s cooked differently.
Present only 1 new/questionable food at a time, until the child is at least 7 years old, and avoid asking your child to eat something new when they are already not feeling well. If your child is very young, it may take several tries for her to know what she enjoys. At the same time, your child should see at least one item of food that she knows she will really enjoy.
5. Do not offer substitutes
Substitutes such as crisps, bread or pasta as then your child will very quickly learn that trying more nutritious foods is somehow not important. Consuming high glycaemic index (GI) foods creates a huge blood sugar spike which will generally make your child less interested in eating anything else. High GI foods are not just sweets – a 150g portion of white rice produces a blood glucose response similar to 10 teaspoons of sugar, and a 150g baked (white) potato and refined store bought bread both have the equivalent of 8 teaspoons of sugar! 
The constantly raised insulin blocks the hormone leptin from telling the brain that our tummies are full. And so these high GI foods make children even more hungry – which is one of the reason why so many children are seen snacking all the time which in turn, leads to issues with insulin and weight gain.
Many parents worry that the child will go hungry but it’s fine – an apple, a carrot, or a handful of nuts can be offered if necessary while you are calmly negotiating the main course! Instead of a white baked potato, you can prepare sweet potato, and instead of white pasta, you could make brown pasta with lots of olive oil and possibly with some protein to lower the glycaemic response. There are more helpful suggestions in the references below.
6. Do a “kitchen cleanse”
I recommend removing all the temptations from your house – the sugary snacks, crisps, artificial sweeteners, and all the refined foods which spike your blood sugar. You may remember the BBC’s series “Dr in the House” in which Dr. Chatterjee would simply have all the offending unhealthy products taken out of the kitchen in rubbish bags. It may upset some particularly if there is an emotional attachment to certain foods, but it will make a huge impact on the health of all the family members and it is the simplest solution for children to see only healthy food at home.
7. Do not use food to punish or to reward your child
This will not only take away any potential to create an emotional attachment to food, but it will also allow your child not to see sugary foods as a “treat”.
8. Shop and cook together
Talk about dinner before it is on the table. Do grocery shopping together and come up with ideas for today’s dishes.
Children love to learn by doing and they simply love helping to prepare meals with their mums. Children as young as 2 can be given little tasks in the kitchen – mixing, measuring, arranging foods and assembling dishes, cracking eggs, peeling carrots and, as they get older, grating and cutting. Cooking is magical. When children have fun, and when they feel included, they are more likely to enjoy eating the food they have helped to prepare and eating it will feel like a celebration. Cooking is also excellent for the development of cognitive abilities – just think about all the thinking, planning and science that your child learns in the kitchen – and of course, it can be a special bonding time with the parent.
9. Do something different
Sometimes, all you need to do is to change the appearance of a particular vegetable or fruit. You can easily bake vegetables such as carrots or spinach into muffins, pancakes, wraps, and also include them in smoothies. You can also use a cookie cutter to cut a fruit or vegetable into moon or stars, or spiralize them into ribbons or “spaghetti”. This works very well with most vegetables including cucumbers, courgettes and carrots and quite often children eat more vegetables in spiralized form than if it they were simply sliced. Children also love dehydrated foods such as kale crisps or grated carrot and flaxseed crackers. If you don’t have a dehydrator, these can be made in a regular household oven on the lowest temperature setting and there are millions of recipes online. Equally, be creative with names of dishes and come up with something that might as well appear in your child’s favourite fairy tale. Who wouldn’t be intrigued to taste “unicorn eggs” or “Harry Potter’s magical stew”? Maybe “dinner” could be called “breakfast” (just to confuse all the other family members) and perhaps, you could all try eating it with only 2 spoons, or with chopsticks, or (this would delight my own children) – eating with your hands.
10. Remain flexible
Be celebratory and flexible when it comes to visiting friends, grandparents, and when going to parties. You can explain to your child that birthdays are not excuses to completely abandon healthy eating – but let your child choose one or two foods which they normally would not be given at home. I would also recommend having a conversation about this with your child’s nursery or school as there seems to be a tradition of handing out sweets for all sorts of unrelated occasions, including swimming and football workshops.
Each child may express a unique taste and different approach to eating. Some children may be naturally adventurous foodies, and then there are those who are more likely to be drawn to less nutritious food *if* it’s on the menu. 
My children have heard me say many times that our dining room is not a restaurant with menu choices. However, we always have options such as several vegetables and salads on the table (we love creating Buddha Bowls as they are colourful and easy to make) and never worry about how much or how little the children have eaten at a meal.
11. Talk about health
I really recommend talking about nutrition with your children and how the food they eat affects them. They may already know how hyper or anxious they feel when they had eaten lots of sweets at parties. If they are older, try watching documentaries together such as Super Size Me, Fork Over Knives, Sugar: the Bitter Truth, or Food Matters – the latter is also a website with great family friendly delicious recipes.
I’d love to hear from you – how do you encourage your children to eat healthily? Please share this article with your family and friends who are looking for some support in raising healthy eaters.
With wishes of best health to you and your little ones,
Magda
References
https://draxe.com/low-glycemic-diet/
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2013/feb/26/healthy-food-train-yourself-like-it
